Thursday, February 4, 2016

Be There

I have a wonderful job so I here.  Patients tell me all the time you have the best job in the world.  You get to see babies born everyday!  I smile graciously an tell them "you are so right, it is the best job."  Thinking to myself NOT, if you only knew.The part of it they don't see if what makes not so the best job in the world sometimes.  They don't see where we all run to a room because a baby is in distress and we are trying to stay calm for the family but we really want to scream! They don't see the part when we are all maxed out with our patient load and we see another pregnant patient walk up to the desk.  The don't see us changing our clothes after we have been splashed with body fluids.  They don't see us cleaning and washing a baby who has gone to be with our sweet maker and us trying to hold back our tears for the family because we have to walk into our  other patients room who is delivering  a healthy  baby.  So why am I writing this?


This sums up how the world is!  Our world is such a busy place.  We are running here and there twenty four seven.  I know that I have heard it said a million times. "there is just not enough time in the day. "  But why?  God gave us plenty of time we just don't manage it well.  He even has to tell us to rest  and gave  us a day of rest. He even rested while making our planet. But as humans we have made or day of rest a day of shopping, cleaning house, going to ball games, hunting, and belive me plenty of committee meetings a church.


There is an old saying that goes something like this  " sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses" What does that mean.  To me it means to slow down and enjoy the life that we have been given.  Before long our children that God blessed us with will be adults. Some of our family and friends will be gone. Things that you thought that would always be there are gone.  No one want regrets at the end of their life. That is why so many older adults go through depression because their life is almost over and they have regrets.
 
Make a promise to yourself to make things count this year. Do the things that can only happen once over the things that you can do all the time.  Like going to a wedding instead of staying home and watch television or go a surprise birthday party.  Make you moments count. Slow down this year and stop to smell the roses.  For me,I really take in the moment of being in a delivery of someones baby because I really do have the best job in the world. 


G

Wednesday, August 19, 2015

The Barstool

Just last Tuesday while I was at work  I received a call at work.  One that no one wants to receive but it will happen probably once to everyone.  "Honey it is me  I just wanted to let you know that your grandpa passed away."  To be honest I was expecting the call to be soon because he had been suffering with cancer in the recent days.  In the next few hours I managed to get off work and prepare to head home for the services.  It wasn't going to be a pleasant visit because I was going to say goodbye to a man I dearly loved but it was also a time I was going to get to see some family I haven't seen in years.  The few days passed quickly.  There were some family members that I got to see they had never met my family.  In conversations with them it was like we just talked yesterday.  Most of them seem to start off with "yeah  I saw it on facebook"   so it was like they just talked to me.  So sad but that is another topic.  With other family members  the bitterness or anger disappeared because we were there for the same purpose, to say goodbye.


Before I headed home back to Loranger. I decided to stop at my grandmothers house for a goodbye. The same house she had lived in since I was a little girl.  Everything still look the same.
She asked me if I would like a cup of coffee.  I poured my cup and fixed it using the same sugar bowl I had for years and then it happened.  I sat down in the bar stool at the kitchen counter and all of those memories came pouring out.  It was the same bar stool I crawled in a child to watch my grandma cook and wash the dishes.  The same bar stool I sat in to read the morning paper with my grandfather as he worked on his crossword puzzle every morning..  It was the same on I would sit in and talk to Tim when I lived there and lived here.. It was the same one she use to tie my girls in with an apron because with didn't have a high chair. It was the same one I had endless conversation with my grandmother and grandfather and all the advice they would give me.  I could go on and on with memories.  All those memories or good ones and I am glad I can say I was able to say goodbye to wonderful man without any regrets.  Don't let someone leave this earth and you wishing you had said goodbye.  Take the time to call them and touch base other than facebook.  Forgive the ones you need forgive.  Love on the ones you see everyday.  Treat everyday like it is the last.

Saturday, October 18, 2014

The Cross in my yard

Every Christmas we decorate our home with lights.  Should I say that I decorate our home with lights. Tim has helped me the last couple of years and the girls attempt to help.  I am really over the entire light thing, but the girls ask me every year to put them up. Just face it, lights are simply pretty to look at.  So I wanted to do something a little bit different last year.  I decided to put up cross in the yard so everyone that passed would know that in our home we knew the "reason for the season." I thought it was a wonderful idea.  until my daughter told me that was totally cheesy.  Despite what my eldest child thought I put the cross up anyway. I decorated it with white lights.  It was so pretty.  I placed it where everyone could see it.  After the season the cross stayed in the yard but has been moved to mow the grass  or to spray round up.  Now it sits behind some bushes on the other side of the yard.  I noticed the other day that it had rags hanging on it from a washed car, "REALLY" , who would do that.  To me  the cross which is only a symbol represents our faith.  Which represents Who and what I believe in. Though it is only a symbol it should be treated with respect just as we should treat our savior.  I realized I was just as guilty for doing the same by moving it around the yard and hiding it behind the bushes because I didn't want it in the yard anymore. So all of this made me think.  I am guilty of bringing Christ out for the special occasions such as Christmas and Easter.  I use him  when I need something, like a drying rack for a dirty old rag.  He deserves much better than that because of what he did for us.

Monday, January 28, 2013

All Cracked Up

 I went to the store to buy groceries for the week.  A typical thing that everyone does at least once.  Yes even the man of the house.  I think my husband has been in the store at least once. While I was in the store I rounded the corner to find myself by the milk and eggs, both which I needed.   I picked a  carton of eggs and did what?  You know what I did.  I opened it to see if any were cracked,  all of us do that.then  I placed them in the basket them made one more stop at the meat counter to buy some roastbeef.  Then I headed to the cash register to check out.  I place all the items on the belt.  Then here come my eggs.  The cashier opened the carton and said " you have two cracked eggs."  I replied "thats ok." and you would have thought I told her she had three eyes.  She replied " what?, you dont want a new carton?"  "No, I just take those."  She even told the other cashier I was ok with having cracked eggs.    I headed home and took the two eggs out and used them like I would use any of them.  They still worked the same believe it or not.  Well of course all of this started the wheels turning in my head.  Dont we treat people the same.  We dispose of them because they are not like the ones we are use too.  They have some flaws or their immediate appearance it is not what we are use too.  So we basically dispose of them in our own ways.    We avoid them or we gossip about them. 
Gods desire is that we love all people no matter how differnet they are from us.  I have to admit it is not the easiest thing to do in the world but that is Gods desire.  He wants all of us to be with him in heaven one day.   I know that I am not perfect.  I have so many holes and cracks that if I were a glass I could not hold water.  God loves many anyway.  I could only hope that I can love people like God loves me.

Sunday, January 13, 2013

What a Week

It is very hard to believe  I had a week like I just had.  One week ago today I lost my father suddenly. I was sitting in church when my phone rang.  Not to interrupt the service  I quickly turned it off.  I did not recognize the number so I did not return the call.  On my way home my brother  called and gave me the bad news.  That was the moment when my world was turned upside down but in the midst of being turned around I found that I was stronger than I ever thought I could be.  I cried really hard the first day then my strong willed self took over and told the cry baby to get out of the way. Something my daddy taught me. He taught me to be tough.  I can remember the day he told to punch a girl in middle school because she was picking on me.  I did and I was so proud to call him to tell him I won. I couldn't let things get in my way and now I wanted him to be proud of his girl taking care of business.. I had to start making decisions that I never made before and had to talk to more people than I every thought I would.. I walked to the casket and make sure he was perfect.  I tucked his smokes in his pocket and gave him his  waffle house coffee cup that he would need. Each guest at the wake was greeted by a hug and somewhat of a smile.  I didn't shed a tear until they folded the flag that draped across the casket,  I felt so guilty for not crying when everyone around was sobbing.  I came home and collapsed on the couch.  Exhausted but unable to sleep. After seeing my sister off and my brother and sit in the silence of my home my heart let go finally.  The cry baby pushed the strong willed out of the way and said have at it.  So the tears came.   I am grateful for all the good times we had.

I see more of him in me the older I get.  He taught me how to mow grass.  I love to mow grass just like him. He taught me how to throw a softball.  He would say " No girl of mine is going to throw like a girl".  Ask my girls how I throw.,  He taught me to punch.  Don't mess with me or you might just get hurt.. ha ha.  He always made me feel safe when he was around because he was tough.  He taught  me how to laugh,  Always acting like a kid.   There are so many things I cant list them all.  But I do know that I didn't tell him I love him enough,  I wished I could tell him one more time but I cant.  So I have learned to not wait til tomorrow because tomorrow might never come,

xoxoxo Daddy

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Bengi

I went to bed and woke up three hours later tonight with a horrible stomach ache.  So I got up and drank some milk and just started piddling around the house until the medicine kicked in. Then I heard the familar footsteps coming down the hall towards the kitchen. No, it wasnt a human companion it was my furry little buddy  Bengi.  Let me describe him too you.  He weighs about 12 pounds, big round brown eyes that make your heart melt and he can be a big fuzz ball when his poodle type fur grows out.  We got him when Karlie was in the first grade.  I was looking for a companion for my yorke Max.  My friend told me that someone found a yorkie type dog and was looking for a home for him.  I called the man and he said I could have him if I wanted.  When I got there, much to my surprise he looked nothing like a yorkie.  He was groomed and Mr Larry said he was trained.  So I brought him home.  He attached to me like we were glued at the hips.  We do have our little routine.  When I get up he gets up.  If I take a nap he takes a nap.  Where ever I go he goes.  I think that is a song.  Tim told me when I go on a trip Bengi refuses to lay in the bed.  He stares out the window waiting for me to get home.   He is so excited when I do walk through the door he is always is the first to greet me after a longs day work.  He runs up to me and jump all over until I greet him. If I dont he will follow me around waiting patiently for a hello from mom.  He loves me more than I can imagine.
Dont let someone touch "hit me" or he will be all over them.  One day Tim was playing around and I yelled.  Bengi jumped on the couch and started barking and biting at Tim.  I think if he could he would do anything for me. Why because I loved him first or because I gave him a home.  I think he knows he has a home too when I put his collar on him.  After his bath he will hold still while I put his collar back on.  It is almost like he know he is home when that is on him.  Believe me it is not all love on my part some days.  There are days when he gets in the garbage, or has an accident on the floor or  rolls in something totally digusting.  Like the time he rolled around in rotten duck eggs.  That day there was not a good day for love.  This reminds me of my relationship with God.  He loved me first so I should love him and be devoted to him because he gave it all to me.  A place I will call home one day and he saved me from life in hell.  He sent his ONLY son to die for me.  So I owe him my life.  Just like I saved Bengi from being on the streets.  He knows who saved him, so shouldnt we realize who saved us.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012